If you want to have a really good laugh sometime, I mean a
fabulous wet-your pants-good-laugh, then put an American friend behind the
wheel of your car and watch his facial expressions as he drives from Lands End
to Penzance.
Remember, Americans drive huge cars. The thought of
yielding, or having to back up, to let another car pass is not something an
American driver has ever had to do in his or her life. We Americans simply
don’t acknowledge that anything exists on the roads other than ourselves,
especially other drivers. Now you begin to see the possibilities for a grand
time.
For the American driver in Cornwall, navigating the serpentine labyrinth
through the hedgerows of the western farmlands is like being in a video game.
You can’t see anything. There is no telling what might pop out from behind the
next curve: car, tractor, cow, clueless hikers, double decker bus, tank. The hilarity will climax when your friend
drives from the top of the hill at the Newlyn School of Art down the mere
trickle of a road to the crossroads below. If your friend has not had a heart
attack or knocked the mirrors off a passing car by the time you reach the
bottom, then you have won the game. Or lost… I’m not sure which.
Of course, if one’s eyes are constantly straying from the
road to the beautiful landscape and skies which one is desperate to paint, then
that makes the driving all the more harrowing. My wife is a non-stop dispenser
of complaints when she is in the passenger seat. And even though I drove our
children without incident to Chapel Carn Brea one Saturday to see the ponies
and climb the hill (which was truly magical) she still threatens to hide the
car keys.
To be continued.
copyright 2012 Cameron Bennett
Congrats on the transition to a West Country expat, Cameron! I am an expat in Athens, Greece - but a native of Devon...so I sometimes miss those lush green hills and love to come home to visit, but then when the rain sets in (which it invariably does), hop on the next plane out of there!
ReplyDeleteWhat on earth made you re-locate to Penzance?? Home of the 'grockles'
Follow my adventures at www.leavingcairo.blogspot.com and Welcome to Blighty!
Hi, Bex.
DeleteWe moved to Penzance for work and to be in an area of natural beauty. And the rain. We can't get enough of it. And the twelve inch slugs. Which crawl in under our door. Love'em. What on earth made you relocate to Greece? You have krakens and hydras there, right?
C.
Talk about going over to the other side! Americans are not as extremely boorish and clueless as you make out. I have backed up several times to let another vehicle pass. True, I would be, at the time, on a dirt road barely indicated on the map, and you may be describing a major way between towns. Sounds super lovely.
ReplyDeleteCameron, I have enjoyed reading your blog and have been laughing my head off! You have a good sense of humor in all your trials... At least by the time it goes to type! I also told Guy (through tears of laughter) that he is NEVER allowed to drive in England! We hope to see this beautiful countryside some day! Your cottage sounds so classic and lovely! Praying that you will find work soon! Hugs!
ReplyDelete